Gifting one player to all 30 teams

December 21st, 2018

It's Christmas! We want to get your team presents. Thus, today, we look at giving a Christmas gift for all 30 teams, a player who fits something the team needs and is realistically available during this Hot Stove season. To make it fair, no player can be used more than once -- every team could use a , after all -- and it has to be an actual possibility: Something that makes sense, both for player and for team. Merry Christmas, all: Here's a player each time might enjoy in their stocking.
AMERICAN LEAGUE EAST
Blue Jays: , LHP
He's starting to fade a bit as he gets older, but he sure does give you innings, and the Blue Jays need as many of those as they can get with all their rotation uncertainty. And hey, maybe he has a bounce-back year and becomes something to flip at the Trade Deadline.
Orioles: , OF
The Orioles have said that Jones will be just like any other free agent on the market, but considering that this team has a big rebuild ahead of it, you might as well give fans a reason to wear their JONES jerseys to the stadium one last season. Maybe you'll even get to trade him at the Deadline this time.
Rays: , DH
Jose Martinez is also a fit if they want to make a trade, but all Cruz costs is money, and the Rays don't have a lot of big contracts so they should have some money to spend. If they get Cruz, the lineup is deceptively scary.
Red Sox: , RHP
With Joe Kelly leaving, you might as well get a free agent reliever who can strike out the Babe. Also, Ottavino went to Northeastern, so he knows the area!
Yankees: Manny Machado, SS
The Yankees can go full circle and get themselves another A-Rod in Machado, an equally polarizing player who worshiped A-Rod as a kid. He'd be electric in The Bronx in every possible way.
AL CENTRAL
Indians: , OF
The Indians need outfielders, any outfielders, and Markakis fits the bill as someone they can afford on a short-term deal. Also, his name sounds a little like "Sockalexis."
Royals: , LHP
He will give you a ton of starts for not too much money, and the Royals, more than anything, need that.
Tigers: , 2B
There are more second basemen on the market than there are positions to play them, and the Tigers, who don't really have anyone to play second base right now, could get Dozier on the cheap … and have a potential excellent asset at the Deadline if a team comes needy.
Twins: , LHP
The Twins say they want another bat, but they need a lefty in their rotation, and Pomeranz is a fascinating buy-low candidate who would fit well in that park.
White Sox: , C
Even closer to than Yonder's brother-in-law, Machado, Grandal is a more than adequate consolation prize if Machado and Harper, as predicted, go elsewhere.
AL WEST
Angels: Mike Moustakas, 3B
He was rumored to have turned down a $45 million deal from the Angels last year. He won't get that much this time, but he still fits.
Astros: , RHP
Now that they've signed , they can go to work on getting a big gun in that rotation. What a wild rotation this would be to watch, with , and Kluber. If the Indians make the move, the Astros would be quite the fit.
Athletics: , LHP
A Spring Training groin injury followed by a strained oblique limited him to two appearances before the All-Star break, but he was actually pretty effective (2.57 ERA in 80 2/3 innings) when he took the mound and won't cost all that much.
Mariners: , SS
The Mariners need a mentor and a guide for as he develops. It's also be fascinating to see who they target in the inevitable trade.
Rangers: , RHP
The Rangers need someone to eat innings, and Texas is one of the few teams Jackson hasn't played for.
NATIONAL LEAGUE EAST
Braves: A.J. Pollock, CF
If the Braves can stomach the injury risk, he's perfect for a team that needs one more outfielder: What an incredible defensive outfield this would be.
Marlins: , 1B
The Marlins need some sort of left-handed power bat: How about the guy who started his career as the heavily Tweetin' Marlin himself?
Mets: , Utility
He should be affordable, and that one more outfield bat the Mets are looking for.
Nationals: DJ LeMahieu, 2B
The Nationals could use a full-time second baseman, and LeMahieu is sort of an ideal fit. Also, oddly, they still could probably use another starting pitcher.
Phillies: Bryce Harper, OF
This is the pick, this remains the pick. But for the Phillies, any present would just be one of Harper or Machado.
NL CENTRAL
Brewers: Yusei Kikuchi, LHP
The 27-year-old Japanese import seems to fit the Brewers and their competitive window perfectly.
Cardinals: Matt Wieters, C
The Cardinals need a backup catcher, and Wieters might have enough cache to actually let take a day off every once in a while.
Cubs: Zach Britton, LHP
With the Cardinals grabbing , Britton is the logical countermove.
Pirates: Nick Ahmed, SS
The Diamondbacks are still selling, and Ahmed is an immediate upgrade for a sneakily interesting Pirates team.
Reds: , LHP
He's the ideal ground-ball pitcher for Great American Ball Park, and the Reds are one or two starting pitchers away from being a fascinating team. Might they even trade Scooter Gennett for one more starter and slot top prospect Nick Senzel in at second?
NL WEST
Diamondbacks: Matt Davidson, 3B
If the Diamondbacks are starting over, you could always try to pluck a 28-year-old who has hit 46 homers the last two years and can even pitch in a pinch!.
Dodgers: J.T. Realmuto, C
Here's the bet on where Realmuto ends up … making their lineup a nightmare essentially top to bottom.
Giants: , 1B/OF
The idea of him playing right field at AT&T Park is a little scary, but he's a bat the Giants could seriously use, and either one of their left-handed relievers might do the trick.
Padres: , INF
He's been heavily rumored to be a Padres target, and he's the sort of post-hype prospect the Padres could have some fun with.
Rockies: Edwin Encarnacion, 1B 
It's time to finally get the guy we've all been wanting in Coors Field for years. Pair him with , and look out.