Did Bill Walton actually say these completely crazy things or did we just make them up?

Bill Walton isn't just a sports commentator; he is one of the most outrageous human beings to have ever lived, the air at hour four of a Grateful Dead show made manifest, a man who lives every second of his life like he's walking through one of those transition sequences from That '70s Show. And on Friday night, he was in the broadcast booth for White Sox-Angels in Anaheim -- the first time in his career he's called a baseball game.

Things immediately got real, real weird.

THIS IS REAL LIFE pic.twitter.com/87ITex8TVW

— White Sox Talk (@NBCSWhiteSox) August 17, 2019

By the end of the night -- after three hours of brandishing baseball bats and making entirely unprompted references to black holes -- Walton had left the Internet in a daze, wondering what in the world had just happened.

If you happened to miss it, though, fear not: We've got a way to catch you up. Walton's shenanigans were so bizarre, in fact, that we're willing to bet you can't tell the difference between things he actually said and things we just made up while doing our best impression of The Dude. Try to prove us wrong.