Orbit celebrated Festivus with his very own pole and by airing his grievances on Twitter
With Festivus -- the holiday invented by "Seinfeld" -- winding down Saturday night, Astros mascot Orbit was just getting started with his celebrations.
But first, he needed a Festivus pole, because tinsel is just too distracting:
Before I air my grievances, I present to you, my #Festivus pole. pic.twitter.com/SnorDyO3hf
— Houston Astros Orbit (@OrbitAstros) December 24, 2017
With that in order, it was time for the Airing of Grievances. Not even Frank Costanza himself could have conceived a better platform than Twitter for that aspect of Festivus.
First up: A resurrection of the mascot's feud with Rays starter
Grievance #1: @ChrisArcher22 and his smelly ways #AiringofGrievances pic.twitter.com/GAugUq5Ntl
— Houston Astros Orbit (@OrbitAstros) December 24, 2017
From players, Orbit turned his attention to members of the media who may have wronged him in the past:
Grievance #2: Meanie media members #Festivus #AiringofGrievances pic.twitter.com/3WVfrhaD07
— Houston Astros Orbit (@OrbitAstros) December 24, 2017
His third and -- for now -- final grievance concerned the bigger picture. Why do we have to work on Opening Day:
Grievance #3: #OpeningDay not being a national holiday #Festivus #AiringofGrievances pic.twitter.com/P0iCtAmoSV
— Houston Astros Orbit (@OrbitAstros) December 24, 2017
Of course, Orbit would probably have to work on Opening Day regardless of its status as a national holiday. But, he's looking out for all the rest of us, you see.
With grievances aired, Festivus can only come to a fitting end in one way: with the Feats of Strength.
Consider this a good Festivus in Houston.