What's going to happen to the Marlins sculpture during the T-Mobile Home Run Derby?
The following is a transcript of a segment from this week's episode of the Cut4Cast podcast. To hear more of the Cut4 staff's weekly banterings about which position player is the best at pitching or how baseball would work in outer space, subscribe to the Cut4Cast by clicking here.
The field for this year's T-Mobile Home Run Derby (airing on ESPN Monday at 8 p.m. ET) has been announced, and it's packed with players who could all easily hit a ball through the roof of Marlins Park. But what about the Miami park's other distinctive feature? How will the iconic home run sculpture hold up throughout the derby? On this week's Cut4Cast, Gemma Kaneko, Jordan Shusterman and Michael Clair try to figure it out.
Jordan: You mentioned the home run sculpture. Is it possible to break it? Because we have the guys in [the Derby] who can hit the ball hard enough to hit the right spot. The bigger question is: Is it going to go off for every one?
Gemma: Right! That is the question.
Jordan: There is no way, right? Or is it just going to be running for 30 hours consecutively?
Gemma: So what I hope is, and this is kind of a deep cut, I apologize ahead of time for this. There is a clock in the Czech Republic.
Jordan: I love it. Go. Take us there.
Gemma: It is an extremely mechanically complex clock. I can't remember the name of the guy who created it ... He's like a Czech national hero. So, this clock: Every hour there is this intense mechanical tableau. Every hour has kind of these unique, weird things that happen.
Jordan: This is crazy because it's in Prague, and I've seen this clock in person, when I studied abroad two years ago. I've seen it. I look at it and think, "I can just look at my [phone] and see what time it is."
Gemma: But there are different people who come out of it depending on what time it is. What I'm saying is: I hope, the entire time that [the Miami] home run sculpture has existed, they've just been waiting for the Home Run Derby. They said, "One day, it'll be in Miami, and this is when all the secrets in the home run sculpture, like the clock in Prague, will come out. Every time, a new thing is revealed about the sculpture. Like, it triples in size, different figures come out of it. More dolphins. Maybe there are some alligators. Anything can happen.
Jordan: But still, if that is true and if that is in store, at what point in the Derby? Is it the winning home run?
Gemma: I feel like it should be for milestones. Giancarlo hit 61 home runs last year. It was insane.
Jordan: It was amazing. I was there. It didn't feel like it was ever going to end.
Gemma: So jealous. It was so much fun to watch. So maybe it's for total home runs. When 20 total are hit, one part of it pops out. 40 home runs, another weird thing happens. All these surprises. Like, the cat that lives in there now -- well, it probably doesn't live in there but, you know -- it comes out and it will wave to people. After 100 home runs, something spectacular happens.
Jordan: I love it. Depending on how complex it is. Say you have a live alligator come out, you have to get it back in before the next milestone. If you have real dolphins come out, because right now they kind of have these figurines going up and down, if you have real dolphins you'll have to time it. Again, I don't want to ruin the idea, it just feels like logistically [challenging] before the grand finale.
Gemma: We can't have logic in this discussion.
Michael: We all know what's going to happen. This will all be ready to go off but there will be some meter that goes off (makes siren noise) like "Whoa! It's too hot! It's running too hot! Shut it down!" "We can't shut it down!" "Cut the power!" "We can't shut the power, we don't know how it's running right now!"
Jordan: That is the other risk. You can't have it delay the momentum of whoever is hitting. So that's the other thing. Again, I think it's a great idea, and I really hope they have something more extravagant. I would hope they add some lights at the very least, some extra layers here or there.
Gemma: You know what would be great? Pitbull.
Shusterman: Standing on top! He's up there and does a verse of a song after every one!
Gemma: He's actually been living in the sculpture this whole time.
To listen to the rest of the Cut4Cast, in which Gemma, Jordan and Michael discuss All-Star Game surprises, players stealing fans' concessions and the Portland Sea Dogs' Trash Monster, just click here.